Hillary Clinton went to her weekly taxpayer funded visit with her fortune teller, only to receive a frightful message. “You are going to become a widow and your husband Bill Clinton will die a violent and horrible death.” Hillary asked her, “Will I be acquitted?”
Chelsea announced that she had met a wonderful young man. Bill Clinton sternly warned her, “Honey, you shouldn’t be spending time on him. I had an affair with his mother. That makes him your half-brother.” Hillary later took Chelsea aside and reassured her, “Don’t worry about it. Bill’s not really your father.”
Hillary Clinton complained to Bill Clinton that Al Gore kissed Tipper Gore every chance he got. “You should do that,” Hillary said. Bill replied, “I will if you insist. But I’ll have to wait until Al is out of town.”
Hillary Clinton once asked Bill Clinton, “If I died would you get married again?” Bill answered her, “I suppose I might.” This angered Hillary and she asked Bill, “Would you also give her all of my clothes?” Bill replied, “Nope. She’s the wrong size.”
Many years after Hillary Clinton’s impeachment she laid on her death bed awaiting the grim reaper. Bill Clinton and his fifth wife stood at Hillary’s bedside, to hear her final words. “Now, Bill, I still have all that money I made from the cattle futures stashed away in a box up in the attic. I don’t want anyone to touch it because when I die, I’m going to grab it on the way up to heaven and take it all with me.” After Hillary breathed her last, Bill and his latest new wife rushed up to the attic to see if the money was still there. Sure enough, it was all there. Bill laughed and said, “See, I told you Hillary was a fool. She should have put the money in the basement!”
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